Over the last few months, I have had several different people tell me I needed to “use my words.” At first it sounds like what you would tell an upset toddler, but in context that comment spoke to my core. Words impact me greatly. I know whole-heartedly that Words of Encouragement is my primary love language. The words of other people have built me up and torn me down in the past, and some of those words have had the power to stick with me over seasons and years. 

When I was 18, I attended a prayer night with the other college-aged ladies in my bible study group. We took turns, each of us sitting in the middle and having a group of older, wiser women pray over each of us. Two women, who I greatly looked up to (and still do), prayed the words ‘plump’ and ‘meaty’ over me, with the added note of not being physically fat (lol), but rather being full of God’s word. Initially, and for a long time, that confused me, but now 14 years later I cherish the way the Lord has stored His word up in my heart and allowed me opportunities to share it with others.

I also remember the moment, after 40 days of waiting to hear anything, when I was finally told that I got my (then) dream job. My boss told me they didn’t want to give it to me because I came off as too cocky in my interview. Her words cut me deeply and I walked out of the office crying so much that my co-workers assumed she told me I didn’t get it. This same woman had previously told me multiple times about how incredible I was at my job and that I gave some of the best interview answers she had ever heard during that interview. If I am being honest with you, nearly 6 years later, her words have stuck with me and still confuse and hurt me. I think she caused me to be hesitant with using my words, because ‘cocky’ is definitely not a word I want associated with my character.

Two and half years ago we moved to West Virginia, and with that move I started a blog. I felt like the Lord was calling me to write about our adventures and to share our journey with all the people we were leaving behind. I wrote several posts before we moved, explaining why we were making the move, and how the Lord had moved so beautifully in our lives in the past as we were obedient and followed Him. I wrote ONE post after we moved. It was an update of life here after ONE month, and then I never touched the blog again. The longer I waited, the harder it was to go back to it. And then, with a sense of shame and failure, I gave up on the idea all together. These last two and a half years have been HARD, but also beautiful. Our family experienced trials and frustration, but also so much growth and love. I believe the enemy came at us, but more-so, I believe our Father carried us through. 

I had a huge break-through with the Lord in December and was able to let go of a trauma that had been holding me back for over 25 years. In January we moved into our dream home. This place is full of so much history: my grandmother was born on this property and the couple who built this house and grew old in it loved the Lord dearly. There is so much evidence of His presence and peace here. So now, we turn the page into a new season, into a more permanent season of life here in West Virginia, and all I’ve heard recently is “use your words.”

“Use your words” my husband told me. I don’t even remember the specifics of the situation, but it stuck with me because he reminded me how well I can communicate my thoughts through WRITTEN word (as opposed to having an on-the-spot conversation about something I am still processing). 

“You’ve got to use your words” two of my dear friends in my women’s group recently told me. “When the spirit puts something on your heart we can see you holding it in, speak it!” This is something I have really been working on. That when I know HE is giving me the words, I need to let them out.

“Write” the Lord so gently whispered to me. At the beginning of this year, rather than a ‘word-of-the-year’, he gave me a list of words. I assumed that this list was for me to study more deeply in the bible, and while I wasn’t wrong about that, He has made it clear that there is more to it. That these words are in fact messages He wants me to write about. I can’t avoid it anymore: He is telling me to write, and so I will. Even if it is just for me to process my own thoughts with Him.

The first word is LIGHT, and y’all, this concept took such a BEAUTIFUL turn as I studied and prayed over it. I feel as if I am bursting at the seams to share it with anyone who will listen, so stay tuned…